Feelings are not facts, but they lead to them.
Emotional intelligence is often underrated and underappreciated. I’m sure you know the friend, co-worker or family member that everyone calls “emotional” ( or maybe that’s you!). There’s not a very positive connotation to the label. It’s almost like a badge of shame that invalidates a person's choices or action “You know how she is, she’s so emotional”.
It’s even harder to combat the negative stigma of expressing or feeling emotions (even negative ones) when some of our favorite entrepreneurs, creatives and businesswomen communicate that their success comes from shoving their emotions to the side in pursuit of success. I’m here to tell you to not fall into the trap. Emotions serve a purpose in your life, so much so that God made it impossible to separate emotions from any interaction you have.
The absence of emotions is considered a sickness. So then why are we always trying to make them go away? Putting emotions away for a moment is healthy and normal. That’s what we’d call emotional regulation. Putting them away forever is a sure-fire way to invite dysfunction into your heart and relationships. Don’t get me wrong, I don’t support expressing whatever urges our emotions elicit, but I do support acknowledging our emotions, inquiring why they’re present and listening when they lead us down a path of truth that feels uncomfortable. Your feelings are not fact, but they lead to them.
The good thing about emotional intelligence is it can always be developed. Here are 5 key components of Emotional Intelligence:
Empathy Emotional regulation Self-Awareness Self Motivation
If you could rate yourself on a scale of 1-10 on each of these components, where would you land? Do you have a majority of some of them? or just a little of all? Starting this conversation with yourself is a huge step to developing emotional intelligence.
I talk more about the subject on the The Healing Circle Podcast! You can listen here!